A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy a rifle. "It's
for my husband," she explains to the clerk “he’s a big-time
hunter.” Did he tell you what caliber to get?" asked the clerk.” She
looks very perplexed “Are you kidding? He doesn’t even know that
I am going to shoot him!"

At the police station, Bubba explained to the police
officer why his cousin shot him.
"Well," Bubba began, "We were having
a good time in deer camp drinking and playing cards. Then my cousin,
Ray, picked up his shotgun and said, 'Hey, you guys want to go hunting?'"
"And then what happened?" the officer interrupted. "From
what I remember," Bubba said, "I stood up and said, 'Sure,
I'm game.'"

After a fatal hunting accident, the police are questioning
the surviving hunter. "How did this happen?" "Well," said
the hunter, "I woke up in the morning and I heard some rustling
outside my tent. I peeked out and saw this deer drinking coffee and
eating pancakes, so I shot him."

Two friends, Bubba and Zeke went to their favorite
deer hunting spot. Upon their arrival, they chose to split up thinking
that their chances of getting a deer would be better if they were
alone. Bubba walked around for almost two hours without seeing any
deer. All of a sudden Zeke saw the bushes move. Taking aim, Zeke
fired into the bush. He ran up to the bush and there he found his
friend, Bubba, shot. Zeke called 911 on his cell phone and was connected
to the Emergency Room at the local hospital. The ER doctor advised
him “Just move him out of the woods and get him to the ER. If you
can get a deer out of the woods you can get your friend out. Just
make believe he’s a deer and you’re taking him to the taxidermist.” Zeke
worked for two hours on getting Bubba to the pickup and to the hospital.
Zeke paced outside the ER for a long period of time. Finally the
doctor came out and explained, "He would have been ok if you
hadn't gutted him.”

If you would like to send in a joke, we’ll be happy
to consider it for publication. It’s clear from the above that Peter
can use help.