Whilst driving down a country lane,
(I thought I'd take a tour),
I spied a couple in a field
Side-stepping the manure.
The man was dressed in smart town clothes
The woman's silks were chic,
So when they crawled beneath a cow,
I stopped to take a peak.
It took a few contortions
To find the right position,
But when they grabbed the udder
I understood their mission.
First the woman suckled
Then her partner had a go.
An indignant calf appeared
And began to nuzzle low.
Shoo! Get away!' the woman cried.
(The milk dripped on the silk).
'I do believe that huge great calf
Is trying to take our milk.'
She said, 'He's almost fully grown.
He should be weaned by now.
He should be eating grass instead
Of nursing from a cow'.
The pair continued suckling
Mid intermittent blows,
But the calf appeared undaunted
By the pounding on it's nose.
'It's time we headed off' said he,
'We've been here for a while'.
'Yes, I agree. I've had enough.'
(She gave a milky smile)
He crawled from underneath the cow
And wiped his milk-stained shirt.
She followed suit and wiped her dress
And brushed away the dirt.
The calf now eager for it's milk
Was quick to take their place.
She chortled, 'What a sight he looks!
With milk all down his face'.
'Now back to work!' the man exclaimed.
'Our tea-breaks nearly over'.
So arm in arm they lightly side-stepped
Back across the clover.
Are YOU still nursing from the cow?
No matter how you have it, if you consume
dairy products you're suckling a cow.