By Tina Locklear, Orange
County People for Animals (OCPA)
Well, my beloved dog Dylan passed this morning.
We had a rough night. She was doing ok when I brought her home after a week in the oxygen tank at Critical Care. They never did figure out if it was heart of lung disease as the cause, although both organs had been affected. She had a big meal and a good nap.
Then came the night and the gasping for air, inability to lay down to breath, and the disorientation and uncomfortableness from being in a sitting position panting. Scott, Dylan and I fell asleep at some point in the night, but she was missing when we woke. Scott found her by the back door and brought her upstairs. She’d gone downstairs and probably tried to go out to pee. She wasn’t dead, but was not in good shape. I called the vet – who did not call me back, but I knew that she must transition this morning and that there was no way I was shoving 7 pills in her mouth to sustain this existence.
So I called the Home Pet euthanasia doctor to come. Then I called my ex Terry to come say goodbye to her as he hadn’t seen her since Friday before he left on his trip.
Dylan and I sat downstairs in the jungle room and she rested in my lap. I told her my plan. Terry came to the house first and was able to spend some time with her. He took her outside and held her in the sunshine and laid her in the grass for a few minutes. Then he came back in and sat with her. We cried. Her breathing began to slow, which was a welcome relief from the fast and rapid panicked breath she’d had. I knelt next to them and petted her and talked to her, telling her Rocko was waiting on the other side to see her and it was ok to go.
We’d had wonderful times together, and there was no need to stay longer in this body as it had stopped serving her. We told her we loved her, and she peacefully slowed her breath until she was no longer here. Her sister Summer was here and came over to lick her head and wish her well too. It was the best for Dylan, which is what we’d asked for… Grant us what is best for Dylan…. This was --- at home, in the arms of loved ones, with well wishes and love, candles and piano music.
The doctor came and visited. She was a good woman, with a loving hug and grounded quiet presence. She took her to be cremated. And now, I feel at peace and am trying to act normal. I guess that is good.
I don’t think I can talk now, but I wanted to let you know. I will be ok by tomorrow. Today, I will just hold space for my Dear Little Friend. I miss her.