A strap which attaches to your collar, enabling you to lead your person
where you want him/her to go.
Any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread in the guest room
the newly upholstered couch in the living room.
Is what you do when your persons have food and you don't. To do this
properly you must sit as close as you can and look sad and let the drool
fall to the floor, or better yet, on their laps.
A social custom to use when you greet other dogs. Place your nose as
as you can to the other dog's rear end and inhale deeply, repeat several
or until your person makes you stop. This can also be done to human's
A container which your neighbors put out once a week to test your
You must stand on your hind legs and try to push the lid off with your
If you do it right you are rewarded with margarine wrappers to shred,
bones to consume and moldy crusts of bread.
This is a malady which affects dogs when their person want them in and
want to stay out. Symptoms include staring blankly at the person, then
in the opposite direction, or lying down.
This is a signal that the world is coming to an end. Humans remain
calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to warn them of the danger
trembling uncontrollably, panting, rolling your eyes wildly, and
This is a dog toy filled with paper, envelopes, and old candy wrappers.
you get bored, turn over the basket and strew the papers all over the
until your person comes home
Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it is polite to run
down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskers clean.
This is a process by which the humans drench the floor, walls and
You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently.
The best way to get your human's attention when they are drinking a
cup of coffee or tea.
A maneuver to use as a last resort when the Regular Bump doesn't get the
attention you require..... especially effective when combined with The
Is a feeling of intense affection, given freely and without restriction.
way you can show your love is to wag your tail. If you're lucky, a human
love you in return. If not, you can always sniff their crotches.
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