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HUMOR ARCHIVES

On this page you will find some of the items, thoughts and messages that were submitted to the Veg-Christian E-mail discussion group, or to all-creatures.org.

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DOG LETTERS TO GOD

  Dear God:  How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom smell one another? Where are their priorities?

  Dear God: When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch?
  Or is it the same old story?

  Dear God: Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar,
the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around?  We dogs love a nice ride. I know every breed cannot have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!

  Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears
him, is he still a bad dog?

  Dear God: Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?

  Dear God: If we come back as humans, is that good or
bad?

  Dear God:
No meatballs, more spaghetti, please!  I'm vegan!

  Dear God: When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands
to get in?

  Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand
signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

  Dear God: Are there dogs on other planets or are we alone?
 I have been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever hear back is the beagle across the street.

  Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to
apologize?

  Dear God: Can you undo what that doctor did?

We welcome your comments:

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