THE ADVENTURES OF CLARENCE AND DOROTHY NUMBER IV, ANIMALS IN THE HOUSE
Animal Stories from All-Creatures.org

FROM

Ivana Gerhard
a fictional children's story for all ages
July 2015

Ivana Gerhard

“Dorothy Devine, come on down”, bellowed donkey Wayne Brayed, the tall, dark and handsome announcer for the television game show, Animals In The House. Dorothy and her neighbors, Susan, Sharon and Karen Squirrel had taken Mr. Turtlety’s taxi to the Leno Jaybird Studios in Orlando, in hopes of being selected contestants for fabulous prizes. “Holy Moley, You ladies sure do get me out of my shell and into the most exciting adventures”, Mr. T. exclaimed. Dorothy stumbled up the stage steps into Bob Barking’s arms, and the Squirrel sisters went “nuts.”

Ivana Gerhard

Dot was overcome with Bob’s presence.” Imagine, a paw to paw encounter with Bob Barking, my favorite TV personality”, she later told her daughter Ernestine. Dorothy had to play three games to qualify for a chance at The Big Deal of the Day; The Cat’s Meow, Thai Pong and The Bunny Pop.

Manila Gorilla, the glamorous presenter, pranced across the stage pulling a wagon full of money totaling $5000. Dorothy was afraid she might faint, but concentrated on Bob’s explanation of The Cat’s Meow. A ten foot cat face was lowered down onto the stage, Its mouth slowly opening and closing.

“Dorothy, climb up the stairs to the top of the face and drop these rubber mice down to the mouth. If you hit the inside center of the moving target, the face will shout “Meow” and you will win $1000. If a mouse lands in the corner of the mouth, the face purrs and you win $500, but if they land in between, the mice will proclaim, “Ha, ha, ha, squeak, squeak, squeak, and you win nothing.”

Ivana Gerhard
Bob Barking

Manila gave her six mice and although Dorothy was a nervous wreck, she managed to hit the center of the feline pie hole. Clarence and Ernestine’s eyes were glued to the Animal House proceedings on their home flat screen. “ Happiness is a wife WINNING”, thought Clarence.

Thai Pong loomed ahead, and Bob was happy to explain the rules. A table held 10 glasses. Dorothy was instructed to stand in front of the table with 20 ping pong balls.

If you can bounce a ball in a glass you win a prize and the glass will light up. The middle glass is a trip to Thailand, which used to be SIAM.” How exciting for a cat whose ancestors were Siamese!!!

Dot bounced away and finally managed to land a ball in a glass. “What did I win? What did I win?’”

Wayne Brayed boomed, “Dorothy, you just won a new designer handbag by Kate Spayed, valued At $200. Dorothy and Bob then moved on to The Bunny Pop. Bob stopped in front of a six foot tall carrot. On the carrot were measurements and dollar amounts. It was a measurement from $1,000 to $25,000, with a floating rectangle. The clear rectangle read $2,000 and went upwards from the $1,000 measure.

Dorothy was told to yell, “Stop”, when the rectangle covered the price of the new car Manila displayed in the background. t was a beautiful silver SUV with a sunroof, and Dorothy imagined cautious Clarence behind the steering wheel, herself in the passenger seat beside him with the wind from the open window blowing her fur and the sun from the skylight on her face, and little Ernie strapped in behind them listening to her ipod and watching the world go by from her booster seat.

Up, up and up crawled the rectangle, until it hovered between $20,000 and $22,000.

“STOP,” screamed Dorothy. Rabbits jumped out of the top of the carrot and hopped around the stage, throwing confetti and balloons with the words YES and WAY TO GO emblazoned on them. Dot was having a fabulous day!

Now it was time for Dorothy to try for The Big Deal of the Day. Dot had her choice of Curtain One, Curtain Two or Curtain Three. She glanced over at the Squirrel girls.

Susan screeched, ”One Dot, one.”

Sharon chattered her loudest chatter,” Two, Dorothy, two,” and Karen was hoarse from shouting,

But held up three paw pads.

“Holy Moley”, said Mr. Turtlety,” These three are going to drive ME to drink, but after I get back home, of course.” Dorothy prayed her hardest and decided on number THREE, for the Squirrel sisters. Manila opened the curtain and lo and behold, there appeared a bank vault.

Bob called out, ”Open the vault, Manila,” who dramatically revealed another wagon which contained $50,000!!! The sisters scrambled up the stairs and Mr. Turtlety lumbered up on the stage faster than he had ever lumbered. Clarence and Ernie were shocked that their Dorothy had won The Big Deal of the Day.

Ivana Gerhard
Leno Jaybird Studios

The little taxi was a vehicle of joy all the way back to Mewville, and  when Mr. T. pulled up in front of the pink Devine house the whole neighborhood was waiting. Brian Bluejay quickly pecked open the car door and led the procession to the Congratulations Party already underway.

Dorothy climbed up onto the tree stump and announced to her family and friends, “I feel so blessed, not only with my winnings, but because everyone I know is happy for ME. After paying the taxes, I want to set up a trust fund to help our children go to college.”

Clarence was never more proud of her.

Moral:
Always have courage and try your best or you will never know what you and God can accomplish. (No mice were harmed in this story.) 

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