All This Time
Poetry By Gerard Haughey

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All This Time
Poetry By Gerard Haughey

Father I have made a mistake in my life-

Never did I believe I was a god.
No.
My mistake was that I thought You
Wanted me to go alone in the world-
Show You what I could do and then be proud of myself
And take credit-

But then, there You stand, above us all
All Knowing- And All Loving-
You want to tell us, but if You do-
You know we will not learn this way.

So You wait. You watch.
And there we go. There, Father I went.
Completely Unknowing, Father- I was alone.

Surely You would have whispered to me, Father
"you will not always be in good company, be careful my child"
Or-
"Read My Word, child- It will give You My Knowledge and My Armor"

I never thought mankind was unkind-
If it ever would be, surely my kindness would overcome them
No. It did not, Father.

And shouldn't I have known?
That even Jesus' Love and Kindness did not overcome the wickedness of men.
So, I go, Father- Alone.

Confused and wondering, Father why do You not help me- Father?
Instead of crying to You, I would say
"how can You let these things happen to me"?
So many things, did happen to me.

And now I finally See!
How strong You are Father-
You are True, Perfectly Steady- Loving
Beyond our comprehension- You intervene-

So, now, I look back at everything!
I can only weep-
When I think-

You did all this for me?

What will it be like, when I see You, Father?
I cannot put it into words.

You kept me alive through it all-
Miracles overcoming the death of me-
All so we could be, together-
Again.

That I would never be confused again.

I just want to say, Father that I See-
And that I Truly Love You With All That I Am.

January 31, 2011 © Gerard Haughey, All rights reserved