Until I See...It's Just Me
Poetry By Anthony James

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Until I See...It's Just Me
Poetry By Anthony James

I fall down
as if my bones turn to cardboard-
falling down like a deck of cards
flat, a mess-

who am I- gosh I wonder about this
so often?

I have so many ideas-
circling around in my round head
and I know I'm alive
I can hear my heart beating
when I put my earplugs in at night
I can see myself, alone in my memory
when my blind fold is on tight
-a perfect darkness

when I don't want to breathe
when I don't want to See-
when I just can't believe

and I do not like the sensation
of falling apart!

what a thing?
to be alone-
and the things I need most
are always the things to go first

like love.

who will pick me up
put me together?
I am apart and scattered-
looking around for a hand-
to rebuild me, put me together
again

and I'm wondering if that Hand
that I am deeply searching for-
and waiting for,
will ever come?

and the very last thing
I want to accept is that
I will have to pick myself up-

but I know,
at the same time-
that I am all I have,

for now.

March 27, 2011 © Anthony James , All rights reserved